So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i think i have herpe
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.