guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
