you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
