drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize