the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
