smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
worst night to have a conscience
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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