when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
