I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize