It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.