i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems