Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
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