I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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