stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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