Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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