Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
