They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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