too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
