please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Randomize
