Christians are straight up FREAKS
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
