Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
he's single and there are thong briefs.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize