she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
