You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Randomize