do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Ladies don't puke and tell
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
