I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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