How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
