Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
