so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
