I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
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