i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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