worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
