It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
