dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
