Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
pray to the hookup gods
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
