I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
