If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
