So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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