You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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