I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize