4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
