Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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