if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize