You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
