He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
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Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
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When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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