He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.