And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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