Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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