Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
