Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
