well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
