Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize