ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
