Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.